My confession

I had always wondered about the intricacies of nature. And as far as I can remember, my questioning mind always sought answers to many queries… queries that left me in doubt of my sexuality. Even as a schoolgirl, I realised that I was more attracted to my best friend than to the other guys. Even though later in life, I was involved in a seemingly normal relationship with a man, I was simultaneously attracted to another friend who also reciprocated my feelings. It was then that I serioisly started thinking about my feelings.

Now, caught in an unhappy marriage but for reasons that are not related to my orientation, I've felt myself being drawn to my female colleague. We share a beautiful relationship and a very good understanding about a lot of things even though there's quite a big age gap. I don't know if she understands my feelings and it does seem wrong. But there have been times when I've found myself wanting to hold her close and kiss her tenderly. Am I going mad? And why does life have to be so complicated?